The Toll of Remote Learning on Families

Second grader Hugh Butler dazes off during his second class of the day. His teacher is showing a PowerPoint about fractions, and his mom, Dori Butler sits beside him, hoping that Hugh can stay still until their break in thirty minutes. Their dining room table has been transformed into a second grade classroom with worksheets sprawled out behind the laptop. These include assignments that Dori Butler will be doing alongside Hugh this evening for homework. As she tries to concentrate on the class, her mind is filled with thoughts of her daughter’s late assignments, dinner plans, and her never ending list of to-dos. 

Courtesy of Collegis Education

Three million women have left their job in the past year, accounting for a 2.8% decrease in female employment. While many mothers were furloughed or laid off at the beginning of the pandemic, many had to leave their jobs as childcare options became slim. 

Dori Butler is one of the many moms who took on the needed role as household educator over the past year, but she has struggled with the shifts in the family dynamic. 

“I have to like literally sit next to him the whole time for him to do anything,” said Butler.

She remarked on how she never intended to be an educator, and being forced into the role this past year hasn’t been easy for the whole family. 

“It really did shake up our relationship quite a bit, she said. “I think with each other, and just dealing with our own depression and anxiety from all of this. We will clash, and yell at each other more.”

Her frustrations have come to a point especially as teachers delay grading assignments. “The biggest hurdle with all the virtual schooling is teachers not updating power school. And sometimes there are updates in Google Classroom that are different that Power Schools. And so, you never know what's what,” said Butler. 

While COVID-19 is still highly prevalent in Wake County, North Carolina, that hasn’t stopped Butler from pushing legislators to reopen schools, and is a member of the ReOpen NC group on Facebook. 

“The impact that school has had on kids is far more valuable than the fear that people are living in,” said Butler. “Kids need school more than teachers need to stay home.”  

As of March 4th, the North Carolina State Board of Education approved a plan to further reopen public schools. By the end of March, every public school must offer at least some in-person instruction, with remote learning reserved for higher-risk students and families. This decision has come from months of push from Republican legislators, as well as many families, to get kids back in schools and out of the house. While the CDC still advises against full in-person learning for North Carolina, hybrid-learning will be in full strides in the coming weeks, with students alternating between in-person and remote learning.   

Butler not only longs to retire her teacher hat when kids go back to class, but she also has seen the struggles that her kids are experiencing with online learning, especially with her sixth-grader,  Kensie Butler. 

Her grades have suffered in the past year as she has had trouble keeping up with assignments. She hardly talks with her teachers one-on-one, and with less divide between school and home life, distractions are plentiful and stress from school can bleed into downtime. 

“Stress from remote learning has increased a whole lot, because I don’t really feel like I’m forced to do any work,” said Butler. “So like I’m stuck with all this leftover work. And I tend to wait a really long time to do it, and then as soon as I do it, I get bad grades, and then I just get super-duper stressed, and feel like I’m not going to pass.”

Even exam days are not immune to distractions. It’s hard to maintain the home-school separation, especially when there’s a comfy bed in the classroom calling your name.

“I had a 40 question test a couple weeks ago, and I just like fell asleep. And I finally completed it like two or three days after. But I still did it. So that's good.”

Jacquelyn Butler is anxious about entering high school in the Fall, especially as this year has proved to emphasize school stressors. 

She said, “There’s a lot of stress and pressure from teachers, and Google classrooms has made it really hard to take a day off.” 

Child psychologist and professor at UNC Chapel Hill, Dr. Beth Kurtz-Costes, remarks on how a major drawback of remote learning is the inability to maintain attention and pick up on student engagement.

“In a classroom setting, a teacher can quickly scan the faces of pupils to see who failed to understand a point, or if some students are becoming bored,” says Dr. Kurtz-Costes. 

It’s hard to imagine the challenges that will accompany kids as they transition back into in-person learning in the Fall, however Dr. Kurtz-Costes remarked on what that might look like.

“Some educators have predicted that this generation of children are falling significantly behind in their learning trajectories,” she said. “Some children might have become accustomed to interacting mostly with family members and might have difficulty returning to a school…interacting with peers on a daily basis.” 

Dori Butler anticipates a new normal going forward, for her kids and for herself, but is ready for a change. The Butler clan will be opting for in-person learning in the highest capacity that the state allows, and until then, Dori Butler will continue to push for legislation changes on Facebook and through local petitions.